February 2012
15 posts
New Interview I did with The Leaky Wiki
I liked this interview a lot because it wasn’t the normal questions you get with the average interview.
Edit: For those who are curious, I actually give out an excerpt from my book in that interview.
Just another ordinary day
Just doing the usual. Getting through morning withdrawal. Working up the energy to do some laundry. Got interviewed by Forbes. You know, the usual stuff.
Wrote My Newest While in Withdrawal
Hardest article I’ve written to date because I was actually smack dab in the middle of withdrawal when I wrote it. It took me twice as long to write, compared to my usual stuff. http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-life-lessons-you-only-learn-through-quitting-smoking/
Day One -- Facepunched
Resorted to nicotine gum towards the last part of the first day, but I did pretty good. Didn’t smoke at all (in fact, we have no nicotine besides patches and gum for help with quitting). Gonna try my hand at sleeping now. Thanks for the support, you sexy freaks. It meant a lot to me.
Now on to Day Two. (I’ll start filming these probably tomorrow)
Qutting Smoking. Again.
I’m probably going to be away from my social sites for a few days until this withdrawal passes. I figure if I’m going to be a dick to people, it’s going to be because I actually hate them, and not because the lack of nicotine in my system is making me physically and mentally flip out.
Started Day One about an hour ago, and I’m already feeling like I could punch random...
donzabu asked: Cracked-related question: with Soren Bowie's articles, the joke is that he's a narcissist who looks down on the less privileged. The joke with Dan O'Brien's articles is that he's a depressed comic book nerd. Is there any such joke going on with David Wong's articles? I'm not sure if I see it.
Interview from a fan!
This guy should do interviews for a living. This was really well-thought-out. http://verbosumprolix.tumblr.com/post/17756950951/john-cheese-gives-good-interview
calvinnohobbes asked: What's your take on influences, I mean how do you walk the fine line between being influenced by someone or just strait up writing how you think they'd write or basically copying them? Today I listened to about 4 hours of Mike Birbigila stand up and every time i tried to write something all I heard was his voice in my head. But maybes its just the fact that I haven't really...
dougcook asked: I really admire your and Wong's work, so I hope you take it as a form of flattery that you two just hugely influenced a gigantic piece of improv me and my friend did on our podcast.
thenerdmonk asked: Are you going to the Cracked show in Beloit next week? I would like to shake your hand.
rodviet asked: I don't know how anyone could ever actually say something bad about your work, I admire you for everything you stand, and I think today's article will be very good for us teenagers who are very likely to take advice from the people you described today, and completely fuck up. Your sincere advice really makes a difference in my life, thank you so so much Mr. John.
chowning asked: I've been reading your stuff since my loneliest days back in a cubicle around 2004. You write good pieces, and I'm happy to hear that you're making a living at it now. I'd pay you myself, but like I said: cubicle. I quit drinking almost 2 years ago to the day. I wish you would talk more about how revealing to strangers or infrequent acquaintances that you don't drink...
forget-me-not-blues asked: Hi John, huge fan of all your work :) Just wondered if there was any more news on the JDatE movie release? MAJORLY excited after reading all the glowing reviews, but been unable to find any info about an international release
entangledversion asked: How much of the world have you seen? and what was your favourite place?
January 2012
67 posts
silkatronik asked: Is there an age limit for working at Cracked (eg so the material remains relevant to the target audience) and as a sub question of that, who is the oldest on the Cracked team?
calvinnohobbes asked: How long does it typically take you to look back on something you've written and say "what was I thinking?".
theimaginaryband asked: How does writing for AskMen differ from the stuff you do for Cracked? Do you need to have a different mindset when you start putting down your thoughts for articles? From my impressions of what I've read so far, you seem more subdued, I guess, in your contributions to AskMen. Just curious.
New Article
My new article on Ask Men on how to meet women when you aren’t a partying “The Situation” type of douchebag. http://www.askmen.com/entertainment/austin_3800/3864_online-relationships.html
tim-the-teapot-scott asked: Hi John, do you have any other life ambitions/things you want to achieve that we don't know about? Cheers mate.
notintonumbers asked: Did you get the idea for your latest article from the Nickelback conversation or did you previously have the idea and just decided to use the Nickelback conversation as a segue into it?
New Interview for Philippine Online Chronicles
This is really well written. You can tell the writer (Fidelis Angela Tan) really knows what he’s doing.
http://www.thepoc.net/thepoc-features/metakritiko/metakritiko-features/14663-crackedcoms-cheese-how-not-to-step-in-dog-s.html
ladyhaleth asked: I have two questions for you: 1) How did you ever manage to grow beyond all of the shit that you faced as a kid? 2) You have written about how your life has improved and about how life gets better in general, but do you really feel like life has balanced out for you? Is it actually worth the horrors of your childhood?
Short interview
This one is only three questions, but I think they’re good ones. http://bearhatfiesta.blogspot.com/2012/01/3-questions-with-john-cheese.html
fleeingbrain asked: Do you know if there is any plan to screen the JDatE movie in non English-speaking countries? And if not, how could an humble fan support the movie beside the obviuos illegal way?
crashtheweb asked: Are you and Dave getting shipped out to see the Sundance premier of the JDatE movie, or is that all Coscarelli's show?
blindhill asked: As a fellow Illinoisian, I am curious to know how you managed to stay in the Midwest and keep a prestigious internet job. I understand that you write from home, but I always imagine that there are certain advantages to living in L.A. and being able to 'know the right people.'
Hear My Stupid Midwest Accent!
I did a radio interview with 96.5 The Buzz out of Kansas City, and you can hear that here. The only thing is that it cuts right into the interview on that first play button (the second play button is them talking to callers), so I don’t know if they meant to put a first half to it or not. If they do, I’ll link it. Also, even on a really good connection, it took me a bit to load...
Questions and Article of the Week
I keep getting questions from people, asking if I still answer questions on here. Yes, I do. I answer probably 20 or so a day, even though I don’t make all of them public. If the answer I give someone is something fairly normal, I tend to just hit the “answer privately” button. If it’s even remotely interesting, I tend to publish it.
Also, I have at least two more text...
imaginationsmiles asked: Do you think you'll ever write under your real name?
New Article is Up on Askmen.com!
I was keeping this under wraps until I knew it was a sure thing, but Askmen.com invited me to write a guest piece for the site, and it just went live. If you could be so kind as to hit the “like” button on that fucker, I’d sure appreciate it.
http://www.askmen.com/entertainment/austin_3800/3857_the-reformed-douchebag.html
Listen to Me Tonight!
Edit: I was told that they were advertising this for next week sometime, but I haven’t heard anything else about it. I’ll let you guys know when it goes live.
I just did a radio interview with http://www.965thebuzz.com/ (click “Listen Live” on the right) and it’ll be aired tonight at 7:30pm Central. It’s a 2-part interview, and it was pretty fun. It’s...
zobimia asked: Hi John. First, I want to say thanks for all the awesome articles! My question is in regards to your childhood. I don't know a lot about you, but from what I read on Cracked, it sounds like you had a tough, abusive childhood. As an adult survivor of abuse myself, I'm curious if you feel that your childhood may have contributed to alcoholism? I personally feel very lucky to finally...
elderclemer asked: You've written before about the challenges of parenting which arose from your irregular parenting / youth. Do you think that the difficulties you dealt with as a youth helped you be a better parent in any capacity?
rodviet asked: Do you ever get tired of the same questions being asked, like: "Are you and Wong the same person? "How did you begin writing?" and, "What do you do on your spare time?" Or does it really not matter?
silkatronik asked: Do you see a lot of yourself in your children? =)
fleeingbrain asked: Have you ever had a wonderful idea, just to realize that maybe is something you read somewhere else? Or have you ever discarded some of your draft because they were similar to someone else work? Most of the time I find really hard to come up with an idea that it's completely original...
New Interview -- Writing and Personal Shit!
I really liked the depth of this one.
Character to Charcter Interview
In this one, the interviewer is done in character (one from Dawn Morrow’s upcoming book). And she’s interviewing me as “John” from the book “John Dies at the End.” Kind of a fun twist on interviews.
http://thedesiderata.tumblr.com/post/15963791192
entangledversion asked: What are your thoughts on Religion and Science?.Whatever the answer I won't be biased. I'm just intrigued by what they may be.
meandancefightr asked: What is the 'hundred man slap incident of 1998'..? I'm probably misquoting, but I'm dying to know.
sexysexyskyrim asked: You seem like a big "hypothetical scenario" person, so I'm sure you've already envisioned this scenario, but I have to ask. You became an inspiration to a lot of people with overcoming your alcoholism. If you were to revert back to drinking, would you even be able to admit it? I mean, I can't even imagine the amount of shame that would entail. I know it's a deeply...
My New Favorite Interview!
This one comes from Thomas, who doesn’t have his own website, but he does have a Twitter (@laputanwmachine). Super nice, funny guy. Here’s the interview we just did over email:
Do you have any advice for anger management beyond what you wrote in your article about internet rage? In real life, I often have the urge to ragekill strangers for (in hindsight) extra silly reasons, so...
Interview #12 -- JC on Weddings!
http://blog.mooreclick.com/2012/01/12/john-cheese-on-weddings/
These are getting better and better. I love how the questions are starting to get away from the more common ones, and are more tailored to the specific sites the interviewers are writing for.
Interview #11 -- I especially liked this one
It’s a different take than we’ve seen so far.
agentsex asked: Do you think it's okay to assume that someone who doesn't drink might be a recovering alcoholic? I have no problem with accommodating someone; on the other hand, I have no idea how other teetotalers might take it. I mean, if someone refuses a drink, I'm likely to say, "Oh, are you an alcoholic?" and I have no idea if this is socially acceptable.
bellybillboard asked: 1. How were you able to become a writer professionally? I'm a writer, but I suck, and always will. 2. Was your goal to be a humor writer or do you have more serious interests that you'd like to pursue? 3. What are your goals now? I'm assuming you had different goals when you were starting out 4. Would you stop by South Carolina some time and eat BBQ with me? 5. Can I write...
cmk633 asked: Love your articles on Cracked, even if I make the mistake of reading your comments. What is it like writing such personal stuff like that? Does it feel liberating or is it something that really takes a toll on you?